First things first. This is from LA County’s public health site:

Historical fetal cell lines were derived in the 1960’s and 1970’s from two elective abortions and have been used to create vaccines for diseases such as hepatitis A, rubella, and rabies. Abortions from which fetal cells were obtained were elective and were not done for the purpose of vaccine development.

 Second things second:

The mRNA COVID–19 vaccines produced by Pfizer and Moderna do not require the use of any fetal cell cultures in order to manufacture (produce) the vaccine. Early in the development of mRNA vaccine technology, fetal cells were used for “proof of concept” (to demonstrate how a cell could take up mRNA and produce the SARS–CoV–2 spike protein) or to characterize the SARS–CoV–2 spike protein.

The fact of the matter is that most Judeo-Christian organizations and followers—even those with anti-choice platforms—find COVID-19 vaccinations and their development ethical. But whatevs! Let us say that your narrow form of orthodoxy requires that you keep your body as clean as possible from interaction with what may have been derived over 30 years ago from an elective abortion. That’s fine. Our country has always prided itself with allowing even most cultish religious and spiritual pursuits the freedom—within reason, and sometimes without reason—to let their freak flags fly.

So you believe that your spiritual wellbeing would be irrevocably damaged by a COVID-19 vaccine derived from or tested on fetal tissue? Okie dokie. Here are some other drugs and treatments and things you are going to need to avoid in order to be a true whatever religion you are:

• Those monoclonal antibody treatments Trump and Joe Rogan and anyone with money and connections are super hyped on? Sorry, Regeneron and Remdesivir were derived from aborted fetal tissue. That means that Sen. Ted Cruz’s political theater push to “remove federal barriers to states purchasing” things like Regeneron and Remdesvir isn’t for you. Sorry. Your God, not mine.
• Tylenol: Bummer right? And that’s specifically because of acetaminophen, which is the generic. Just saying.
• Ibuprofen: Ouch! Great anti-inflammatory. 
• Aspirin: Egad!
• Tums: No more tomato soup for you, amiright?

And there are so many more! Everything from cholesterol treatments (Lipitor) to common allergy treatments and antihistamines (Claritin and Benadryl) to decongestants (Sudafed) to hemorrhoid treatments (Preparation H) all used fetal cells at some point during their development.

So if you want the kingdom on the terms that allow you to claim a religious exemption for COVID-19 vaccinations, you’re going to have to start walking that narrow path with more purpose. And guess what? Most people I know are fine with that. The number of people who are willing to follow a strict orthodoxy to the letter with regard to medical exemptions is small. 

So go forth with your specialized religious belief. But remember, if you are going to put all of us and everybody else at risk because of your moral compunction, then you better not start whining about needing an Advil. You find out exactly what you cannot take and you don’t take it, across the board. Either that or you’re full of hot garbage.