Ummm, everything was closed, for a while. Then we learned that we could reopen many segments of the economy with mitigating precautions like masks and social distancing. Then vaccines arrived, giving us hope of a true return to normalcy, but we didn’t know shitbags like these would be standing in the way of progress by stomping their feet and refusing to take vaccines. 

All the prophets, guys. And by “all the prophets,” we mean YouTube. Well, two or three “witnesses” on YouTube. It’s hazy. Definitely two though. That last one is a maybe. 

Guys, turns out a military takeover was not imminent. 

All the Q prophets were wrong. Again. 

They’re so classy and full of Jesus’ love with the “ho” shit about Vice President Kamala Harris. True deplorables. 

Guys, she totally told you that a sixth degree polynomial algorithm was used in key states. She was on that from the very beginning, and you thought she was crazy, but nope, here it is, on the well-known prophet website YouTube. 

I first googled “6th degree polynomial algorithm,” but that’s just a math formula. Figuring that the Q crowd took a fancy-sounding mathematical name and attached it to something-something election results, I dug further, and yup. There it was:

Now, a new filing in the case claims a more far-reaching conspiracy, one in which state government purportedly deployed a predetermined “key” to mathematically “convert” records of registered voters into counted votes.

The filing cites an analysis by Douglas Frank, who chairs the math and science department at a school in Cincinnati, that claims to have discovered that Michigan and other battleground states each used a unique key.

The filing defines the alleged “key” as a “sixth degree polynomial” that “unlocks the door and uncovers the ability to manipulate data and results.”

Frank’s analysis was filed as an exhibit in the case and he explains his findings in a YouTube video that has received more than 26,000 views. Frank says his work shows that “elections are being decided at the state level.”

This crackpot theory was amplified by Mike Lindell and the dumbest site on the internet, Gateway Pundit. The Detroit Free-Press then spends time debunking the claims, so head on to that link if you want the fuller story. It’s actually quite fascinating the lengths these people have gone to invent fraud. 

Are these the same prophets who claimed a military takeover was imminent? 

And can we point out that this woman was cheering a military coup in this country? They are a massive threat to our democracy. 

Trump got 74 million votes, so I’m going to say that “HUNDREDS of MILLIONS” is an exaggeration. 

Also, they cared. They always cared. The N-word and homophobic slurs predated any liberation and equality movements. 

They cared. 

Oh look, another prophecy. But this one is a little smarter—pushing out the big date until September of next year. That way, when it doesn’t come true, as usual, it’s easier to forget that the claim was ever made. 

Look, it’s Candace “Angel of Death” Owens. Her appearances always presage death. 

I guess now she wants kids to remain uneducated. Don’t want edumacation to turn more innocent conservatives into liberals. 

Did Ann Coulter officially pass the baton over to Owens or what? 

Yeah, maybe they should’ve let the JoeHoVaxx witnesses into their house. 

Satan is like, “Thanks for not vaxxing! That made my life so much easier!”

I have a lot of sympathy for a lot of these cases. But when they call the vice president a “ho,” that sympathy immediately evaporates. What a depraved, disgusting, deplorable person to post that shit. Sorry for her family, and maybe even her husband who’s not looking so great. At the very least, he wasn’t posting that kind of trash online.