Ted Cruz picks a fight with a bird; Border Patrol ‘shadow’ unit covered up abuses


This is the best decision I could possibly make. There is no way this could possibly backfire or make me even more widely despised than I currently am. Feelin’ good about this.

In the news today: A sitting U.S. senator is picking a fight with a Muppet because the Muppet tweeted about vaccinations and, apparently, that counts as “propaganda” to the toad-breathed kultureklowns who believe Trump secretly “won” an election he lost, books about racism are the real racism, and making the smallest concessions to public health during a pandemic that’s killed 700,000 Americans counts as “socialism.”

It’s not Sesame Street that’s breaking new ground here, though. It’s Republicanism that’s changed. Ted Cruz couldn’t stand up to Donald Trump, so instead he’s directing his impotent frustrations at an imaginary bird that teaches children how to read and express emotions ‘n stuff.

Here’s some of what you may have missed:

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